The Emotional Impact of Prematurity

I’ve already blogged about the statistics of premature births in the US and what you can do to help. But today, I want to share my personal story – the Mom side of prematurity.

Three-years ago this past September my son was born 12 weeks early by emergency c-section. A c-section was not part of my plan. I wanted a regular, old fashioned, push-it-out birth. I won’t say ‘natural’ because I didn’t think that I would pass on the drugs when they were offered, but I was going to try. I was going to have my mother and my mother-in-law there, possibly my sister too, if they wanted to witness the birth. I wanted to make it a wonderful, welcoming experience that a birth should be.

But I had developed precclampsia. My blood pressure sky-rocketed. My placenta abrupted. He needed to be delivered immediately for his safety, and for mine. He weighed 2lbs 9oz and was only 14 inches long.

It all happened very quickly – so fast that I had general anesthesia because there was no time for an epidural; so fast that I had bruises on my belly for a couple weeks afterwards because the doctors focused on getting him out instead of being gentle; so fast that my husband hadn’t finished calling our parents to tell them what was going on before they came out of the OR and barked at him”It’s a boy – now follow us”.

There are many things that mothers-to-be can’t wait for when they think about delivering their child. Hearing “it’s a boy”, hearing the baby’s first cry, holding the baby when it’s just minutes old, kissing your husband, etc, etc, etc.

• I didn’t get to hear my son’s first cry – neither did my husband.
• I was high from drugs that I don’t even remember seeing my son the first time I visited him.
• I wasn’t conscious to help fill out his birth certificate.
• We don’t have hand or foot prints from the hospital and we don’t have and official hospital picture.
• His first picture is a Polaroid that the NICU nurses took for us since we didn’t have our camera.
• I didn’t get to hold him until he was 3 days old.
• The first time he ate was through a feeding tube.

Joey was in the hospital NICU for 8 weeks. I wish I could say that the day we brought him home was the end of the whole ordeal. But there was 3 years of follow-ups and evaluations, constantly reminding us of the drama involved with his birth.

There is also an emotional scar. A scar that is filled with guilt (what did I do wrong), sadness (why did it happen to us) and anger (why cant anyone tell me why it happened). My doctor tells me it’s a form of post-traumatic stress disorder. Even after 3 years, I still feel the scar and all the emotions related to my son’s birth. So I blog about it to support the March of Dimes.

The March of Dimes has taken on this devastating problem—to find out what causes it and how it can be stopped.

Call To Action: How can you help?

1. Sign the Preemie Petition

2. Join Kristine’s Blogging for Prematurity Awareness campaign and help spread awareness

3. Comment, favor, and share (Twitter it, share on Facebook, Stumble it, etc) my Resources for Preemie Parents page.

4. Post the following button on your blog or site:

<a href=”http://www.marchofdimes.com?kbid=1685″ target=”_blank”><img src=”http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j189/girlie0226/mod_pam.gif” alt=”Support The March Of Dimes”></a>

Note: 100% of the proceeds from this link go directly to MOD.

Remembering Homecoming

Today is a little more than just about trick-or-treating and costumes for me. It’s the anniversary of the day Little Dude graduated from the NICU and came home.

Little Dude came into this world in a very dramatic way: I had a placental abruption due to my sky-rocketing blood pressure (preeclampsia) in my 28th week. Once I abrupted, I started contacting. With each contraction the baby’s heart rate dropped. So emergency c-section under general anesthesia. 12 weeks early!!

Little Dude weighed just 2lb 9oz, but he came out crying and moving – a sign that he was in good shape. But he was still put on a respirator for just a few days.

After 8 weeks in the NICU, he was released weighing 5lbs 4oz – still tiny, but quite a fighter!

Now he’s 3 years old and a typical toddler! He’s in the 50th percentile for height and weight; he’s right on target for his fine and gross motor skills; his vocabulary is above average. Often times, people cannot believe he was so premature because he is so “normal” and healthy.

I give thanks on a daily basis for being blessed with my preemie. We are blessed to have had an early, but healthy preemie. We are blessed to not have had any complications, infections or surgeries during our NICU stay. We are blessed to not have any lasting complications or birth defects due to his prematurity.

November is Prematurity Awareness Month.  Did you know that 1 in 8 babies are born premature? Did you know that more newborns die from premature birth than any other cause? Support The March of Dimes Petition for Preemies. The petition’s goal is to:

• increase support for prematurity-related research
• urge federal and state policymakers to expand access to health coverage for women of childbearing age and to support smoking cessation programs as part of maternity care
• urge hospitals and health care professionals to voluntarily assess c-sections and inductions that occur prior to 39 weeks gestation to ensure consistency with professional guidelines
• convince businesses to create workplaces that support maternal and infant health

Sign the Petition for Preemies – and pass on the link to your friends!

We’re Walkin’ This Weekend!

The March for Babies is this Sunday. Yes, I will walk the 6 miles. Joey however will probably “stroll” most of it. It’s our 3rd year in a row walking for The March of Dimes, and Joey’s Posse grows every year! I have a team of 10 walking with us this year! (That’s Joey and I walking at last year’s event).

This afternoon we will be making our team poster. It’s going to be hard for me since I am including pictures of Joey when he was in the NICU. But looking at him now makes me feel so blessed and thankful that everything turned out alright.

Sunday morning will start out early! I need to be at the walk site by 8am to set-up the Family Teams tent. The captains of all the family teams distribute important literature to everyone that stop by our tent.

Before I get too busy with the events for this weekend, I want to take a minute to shout out some link love and thank you’s to some of my friends that have helped my team and provided us with support!

Thanks Jeni from DesignDelites.com for creating our new logo! Fabulous work as usual Jeni!

Thanks to Stacee from JalapenoDesigns.com for hooking us up with t-shirts!

Thank you Annette for not only donating a prize from CrittersWhoCare.com, but for also allowing me to promote our fundraising efforts on your site! (Click Here to Listen to Annette and I chat about my story and our dedication to The March of Dimes)

And thank you to all our sponsors! There is still time to sponsor us – Just click here!