What You Say Really Does Matter

Have you ever spoken unkindly to someone? Did the words profoundly affect that person?  Words are powerful; and when they are used to hurt someone, they can be devastating.  The words you speak and the things you say do have a huge affect not only on yourself, but others as well.  Yes, what you say really does matter.

Have you ever called yourself stupid, dumb, idiot? Have you berated yourself in front of the mirror because you feel fat?  Do you realize every word you say is being processed by your subconscious and, in some cases, imbeds itself there?  Thus, it begins to seep into your conscious self and the feelings of self-worth begin to dissipate.

What you say ultimately translates into eventual belief.  If you utter to yourself, “I’m not very good at soccer,” you will never succeed in that sport.  You are setting up a defeatist attitude even before you begin.  When you begin a thought or a sentence with a negative word, your expectations can never be realized. 

So too, you may call someone an idiot. While you may apologize, the word has already been spoken; you can’t take it back.  The person on the receiving end of the insult may take it to heart, and can be changed forever.  We live in a world where words are used to attack, cajole, embrace, nurture, disengage, provoke and inspire. We not only hurt ourselves, we hurt others as well.  Anger, frustration, and disappointment contribute to the misuse of words.  Even though the aftermath of unkind words are realized, we still do it.  Perhaps the old adage is true, “If you can’t say something nice, then don’t say anything at all.” 

It is important to realize the affect words have on us. Whether we mean to say them or not, said often enough they can transform the very essence of who we are.  Children are especially vulnerable to words.  Yet, we continue to use unkind and often insensitive words as a disciplinary measure.  Eventually, they grow up with low self-esteem, or painfully shy, or feel they are worth anything at all.

The next time you speak, think about the words you are about to impart.  Choose them wisely when speaking to your peers, and cautiously when speaking to children.  Understand that one word can positively or negatively affect someone’s life; even your own.

What it Takes to be a Successful WAHM

Being a work at home mom can be one of the most satisfying things you can do with your life. You will be able to spend time with your family and have the opportunity to create a successful business. It takes a lot of work, maybe more than you realized when you first started out. Here are some tips on how to keep going when things get tough.

There will be days when you feel like giving up. Don’t give in to those feelings. Success is not found overnight. You are going to have to put in a lot of time and effort when it comes to building your business, but you can do it. It is ok to take a “mental health day” once in a while, but when that day is over, you need to get up and start working again.

Stay motivated by hanging up pictures of your kids near your computer or phone and writing down what you want to accomplish by working at home. Maybe you want to pay off credit card debt or save for retirement or buy the kids a pool. Whenever you feel discouraged – read what you wrote down or look at the pictures of your kids. It will inspire you to keep working!

Try to find a mentor – someone who has already found success in the work at home field you have chosen. They know exactly what you are going through and can offer advice when you ‘get stuck’ on something. They can also help keep you accountable when it comes to your goals.

If you haven’t taken the time to write down your goals, take the time now. By having your goals written down on paper you will have a clear definition of what you want. Once you have them on paper, take a closer look at each one and write down specific action steps you can take now to achieve them. For instance, if your goal is to build a website, what are three things you can do today to accomplish that? Keep looking forward toward your goals and you will find yourself achieving success!

Tips on Avoiding the Comparison Trap

Have you ever heard of a term called “healthy competition”? Competition can be a driving force when used properly. For instance, when two or more WAHMs get together and see who can sell the most product in a month or who can make the most customer follow-up calls in an hour can be fun. Having that competition going can give you something to work for and you may end up accomplishing more than you would have otherwise.

However, things can turn unhealthy when you start comparing yourself to your WAHM friends.  If you have you ever found yourself thinking “Gee, Sally is so successful. I wish I was more like Sally.  My life would be perfect if I could be like Sally.” You are comparing yourself to others. It may seem like human instinct – but do not fall into the trap!

You need to be proud of who you are and what you are doing. You do not have Sally’s life – she may have older children and eight hours a day to work on her business whereas you have a newborn and a toddler and only a few hours a day to work. It is important to set your goals realistically. Remember the old saying “Rome wasn’t built in a day?” It applies to your business as well! And who knows if Sally is really as successful as she is? Maybe she is saying she is more successful than she actually is. Sally may actually be comparing herself to you!

It is normal to wonder if your business is doing well, or if you are making as much as you could be. Seek out advice from someone who has been where you are now. They can offer an honest opinion and can tell you what they did to achieve their success. Remember to use their advice as a guideline. You need to set your own deadline. It doesn’t matter if it takes you a bit longer to achieve your goals. Building a successful business is not a race – it is a marathon! By working consistently on your business, you will achieve your goals.

Tips for Staying Focused on Your Business

If you are easily distracted, staying focused on your business can be harder than doing the actual work of your business! It is very easy to procrastinate, especially when you are a WAHM. There are always ‘so many other things to do’.

Here is a secret that you may not have heard yet: The dishes can wait! The laundry can wait! So feel free to make those phone calls or answer those emails. The laundry and dishes will still be there, waiting for you! However, if you wait too long to call a client back, they may move on to someone who gets back to them faster than you do.

Why did you become a WAHM in the first place? Did you need to bring in an extra $500 a month to pay off credit cards? Was it to put money away for your children’s college fund? Or was it to save for retirement? Whatever the reason, write it down and put it where you will see it on a daily basis. When you are feeling distracted, look at what you wrote down. It will be easier to work when you remember why you are working in the first place.

You may want to team up with another WAHM. Send each other your goals and keep one another accountable. Call each other at the end of the day and discuss what you accomplished; you can share your successes or lend each other a sympathetic ear over things that didn’t go as you planned.

Stay motivated by setting daily, weekly and monthly goals. If you “work backwards” you will create a road map to your success. For instance, if you are in direct sales and your financial goal is to sell $1500 in product that month. Do the math and you’ll see that you need to sell $375 of product each week. Now, how many home parties do you need to hold each week to accomplish that? How many phone calls do you need to make each day in order to schedule those parties?

When you accomplish your goals, give yourself a little treat to remind yourself that you worked hard and achieved success!

Positive Thinking: A Powerful Tool

Have you ever met someone who was so positive about life, you wish you felt that way as well? You can.  Positive thinking is a powerful tool.  Our minds control all of our thought processes and can be the catalyst for living a happy and positive existence or live life with a doom and gloom attitude.

Here are several ways to not only improve your mindset, but your life as well.

* If you are faced with a negative thought, change it to a positive one. Remember the movie, “Pollyanna?”  Her father taught her the “glad game.” She encouraged the town to find things to be glad about. Eventually, they did and were happier than ever before.
* Surround your life with positive people. Go to events which bring you joy or have special meaning. Invoke positive memories whenever you can.
* There is a saying, “It’s the simple things in life that make me happy.” Find those simple pleasures, no matter how small or insignificant they may be. They are yours to enjoy.
* Laughter is the best medicine, especially for a heavy heart.  Be around people who make you laugh; it’s quite contagious.
* Love yourself; nurture the inner you; love others, and most of all be kind. Greet the doorman in the morning, or give a hug to someone who needs it most.
* Help someone less fortunate than yourself. Volunteer your time at a nursing home or hospital.  When you give, you receive ten-fold.
Remember, what you do affects others.  If you are negative, people will shy away from you. However if you are positive, you will be surrounded by people who wish to be in your company all the time. Congratulate yourself on jobs well done! Positive thinking breeds positive results.
Begin your day in a positive manner. Nothing is worse then getting up in a grumpy mood.  It not only sets the tone for the days’ events, but impacts your family as well.  Place flowers around your home; open the curtains and let the sun shine in. Also, add more light to your home if needed.  Light has a direct effect on one’s mood.
Changing the way in which you view life can make all the difference.  Try not to think about the negative aspects, but focus on the positive blessings in your life. Turn off the bad news, and channel your thoughts in the direction of goodness.  It may be cliché, but take time out to smell the roses.  Give thanks for all you have; and be generous to those who have nothing.

Take a look at the smiles on your children’s faces. Nothing in the world can negatively impact the feelings those smiles invoke. Live life to the fullest and enjoy every precious moment of it. 

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